Posthuman Shit: It really does smell like roses

Apologia:
Here I go again. It's my fourth post and I'm still talking about the little things in life. This time it's all about the smell of posthuman excrement. Seriously, don't I have something better to do.

Nope.

So before, I draw any scientific (used loosely here) conclusions about what posthuman waste is or isn't, I think it's prudent for me to step way back and ask a fundamental question. Will posthumans crap?

Sure, some of you may be saying to yourselves, "Who gives a shit." (lame pun intended) and some of you will even press the left arrow to prove the point but for those of you curious enough to stick it out a bit longer, you can feel good knowing that we are about to discover a deep insight into the reality of posthuman life.

Biology and Conservation of Energy:
Back to that posthuman crap. Will they? Why would they? What about the smell? Without going through a biology class, let me just say that crap in equals crap out. Many of you IQ follower types are probably thinking that the posthuman energy source of tomorrow isn't crap because crap isn't a very efficient food source and that you just scored yourself another IQ point. But you are wrong. Here's why.

The only energy source that would be available to a human who goes through a transhuman phase to become posthuman is the organic kind and if it's organics in it's organics out. Decomposing organics don't really smell that great unless you're a gardener. Even better, a gardener who grows rose bushes. I am not a gardener.

You see, the most readily available energy source for non-biological components in a biological human would probably be Adenosine tri-phosphate (ATP). Again, we'll skip biology class and try to get to at least one point. The point is, that at each stage of each transhuman phase will be the installation of components that use biological process to derive energy. When that last bit of biological human is finally removed, and good riddance because it was starting to stink up the hardware, there will remain a complete non-biological human that was designed to use organic food as the primary energy source.

Waste of Effort:
As we all know, not every organic molecule is useful to our bodies. If all of the molecules were useful, our throne would have to be resigned to the fact that it was just a porcelein God. Alas, this is not the case, we use it regularly for a throne and only on rare occasions do we pray to that forgiving God.

Surely we recognized that our bodies, through evolution, have predetermined which molecules take a little energy input to get a large energy output and which molecules are just a plain waste of effort. This "waste of effort," my friend, is what we shall call "posthuman crap."

Removing That Smelly Smell:
Now about the smell. If, for some reason, our posthuman selves determine that smelly crap is beneath us then our embedded nanites could expend the extra energy required to sequester the remaining aromatic volatiles and move them to off site storage or possibly convert them to something useful.

Or...

Since it would be a waste of effort to sequester organic volatiles or to convert them to something useful or especially to add the extra step of replacing the crap smell with essence de la rose petals, it would be much more likely that crap smells will continue to smell like crap.


This smelly crap future is not so bad though. Posthumans will be able to specifically filter out unpleasant odor information or reroute automatic response signals in such a way that the famed smell of butt won't be perceived as necessarily good or bad but merely as useful information such as for predicting what a person ate the night before. "Ewww! Did you have a dozen boiled eggs for dinner or what!"

There's Always a Catch:
This posthuman crap thing, however, only works if posthumans decide to continuously occupy their regularly upgraded living quarters (their bodies). All bets are off, if instead the posthumans decide to upload their minds and completely leave the body behind, which, by the way, is a decent segway into my next post...The First Posthuman.